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Random musings and whimsy.

Dilbert's Laws of Work

  • Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
  • You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
  • When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
  • If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
  • Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous."
  • If you are good, you will be assigned all the work.
  • If you are really good, you will get out of it.
  • At work, the authority of a person is inversely proportional to the number of pens that person is carrying.
  • When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
  • Following the rules will not get the job done.
  • When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"
  • The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.

Date & Time Posted 3:16 PM, Sunday, 28 May 2006, by Faber Optimé.
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